2004-10-12 - 12:04 a.m.

proposals and herbal tea

Phew. I just spent two f*!&ing hours futzing with an online proposal submission tool - the kind that is supposed to make your life easier, but ends up creating all kinds of pain (mostly self-inflicted as you rip your hair out trying to get the web interface to do what you want it to.) Well, the end result is that I think that I submitted one proposal successfully (and managed to do the dishes in between each slow and painful click..).

The good news: the proposal is finished. The bad news: the lectures await me. I have wake to greet the sun and prepare two lectures tomorrow morning. And then last until the end of the day: a choir rehearsal that doesn't get me home until 10:45pm.

I made a decision this week to curtail my alcohol intake considerably. My consumption levels were reaching dangerously high proportions. I really love the taste of both red and sparkling wine. The trouble is, remember, I spend most of my time alone, and I have begun using wine as if it were water in the evenings, sitting before my computer writing lectures, and consuming without any recognition of quantity. Not a good habit.

The good news is, in the absence of the fermented grape (at least for the past few days), I am just fine. I don't really miss it as long as I have some kind of cup in my hand. That means I am drinking excessive quantities of herbal tea, but it seems to serve the same purpose. And, it keeps me warmer.

The ease of this transition is a comforting realization. As a daughter of an alcoholic, and knowing that these patterns are genetic, I find myself panicking about this from time to time. Probably not a bad thing. Life is too good for self-destruction.