2006-03-04 - 10:07 a.m.

..nesting behavior..

I'm awake, I've had my first coffee, my head is still in the mists of a very strange dream involving a sexual encounter with Jon St3wart, a comic book, the strange rodent-like woman who lived across the hall from me in college, and an old steakbone. I have NOOO idea. Maybe there was something in the miso soup last night.

I can't believe that it's already March. Of course, the weather seems to be confused as well. It's been a quirky season and we've finally gotten a touch of cold. I like the cold air stinging my face - but then again, it isn't REALLY cold. It just feels cold because, apart from a brief little blizzard a few weeks ago, it's been downright balmy here. I kind of like hearing the wind howling outside. I like sleeping under mounds of covers, surrounded by cats. It makes me feel secure.

I've been overwhelmed by my schedule. I just have too many things to do, and they are not going to get done, that is clear. I'm not going to go down the list of unfinished tasks in this journal, because it will simply make me feel worse. I should simply remember that hours in the day are like energy - they cannot be created or destroyed. (although, like energy, they CAN be wasted...) Nevermind, forget that attempt to philosophically settle my distressed mind.

Yesterday, Jeff and I went to IKEA to buy things for K's imminent arrival. The major purchase was a proper desk, but also lots and lots of shelves. The whole trip turned into a 12-hour venture. Poor Jeff's back started giving him trouble halfway through the trip, but he rallied and made it through the day. I am grateful to him for his help. I am hoping that this will make it easier for K once he arrives. In the meantime, I have some major rearranging that needs to get done, to make space for K.

Oh, yes, and then there was the extra $$ spent on candles.....I am a candle addict, and just hope that I haven't made my flat look like some bizarre temple to an obscure religion.

Jeff bought a house last week - in Pennsylvania. It seems as though it was a rather spontaneous decision. He spent most of the day wondering if he had purchased the wrong house. (after he signed the contract for the first, he saw one that he likes better.). I didn't quite know how to answer that quandry...Jeff is an interesting person - humor and intelligence blended with a large dose of neurosis and whackiness. He has a good heart. (which, I realize, is a phrase I use when I want to like someone even though they drive me a little bit crazy.)

Jeff drove me a little bit crazy yesterday, but I feel bad about mentioning it because he was doing me a HUGE favor. In the past few weeks, when I've been with other friends, I've simply started comparing them with K. Katherine and I went to MoMA together, and although I enjoyed my time with her, more than that it reminded me of how much fun K and I have when we go out together. He and I have the same museum style - we browse and stop at a very similar pace, which amazes me. Yesterday, while going through IKEA, I missed K. He and I also have a very similar IKEA style... Things just work smoothly. I can't believe I'm typing this, but K is just so optimistic and cheerful, and doesn't get dragged down by the negatives. It's just fun.

K reminds me of my best friend B in England. B and I wear the same filter when it comes to humor. We laugh at the same things; we find the same things ridiculous; we have similar feelings about how people should behave towards each other. What do you call it when you share a core of beliefs, style, and perspective with another person? Well, whatever it's called, I share the same with K.

**

Anyway, I just got a telephone call from my colleague - we were going to go out with a visitor from Germany this weekend, but she called to say that it is too cold and windy to go into the city. I guess that's a sign that I can get back to building shelves.